Okay, so I’m no relationship expert and I don’t claim to be, but I do feel as though I’m pretty good when it comes to relationships and matters of the heart. Maybe I was blessed with an old soul or maybe in a past life I was a fortune-teller, either way below I have come up with five probable things that can help you decipher if she or he is NOT the one.
1. They do not root for you
If you come to them with big news about a new promotion or your acceptance into an awesome school and they doubt your ability to get it done, they are not for you. The person for you would not only be encouraging, but would be ecstatic when you told them the good news. They would be jumping for joy as if they are the ones getting the promotion, not acting as if you’ve taken it away from them.
2. Your accomplishments are not their accomplishment
When someone loves you, even the tiniest of accomplishments are a huge deal. This person believes in you so much that when you get something you finally want, they feel as though they have gotten it too. Happiness is contagious, especially in relationships. If they aren’t happy for you, but instead upset or jealous, they are not the one for you. When you succeed they succeed.
3. Any amount of time, is not enough
If you find yourself constantly trying to spend time with someone, chances are they do not want to spend time with you. That is a dead give away that this person is not right. Yes, sometimes someone can be busy or sleeping or their phone died, but if these are constant excuses you find yourself making, it’s time to move on. It’s natural for us to want what we desire, we make time for the things we like. When someone really likes someone, they spend most of their time with them, making sure to free up their day just to see them, even for a little. So if you find you’re barely seeing them, they probably aren’t for you.
4. You’re always reaching out
This goes hand in hand with number 3. If you are always the way one texting, calling, reaching out, initiating conversation, that means you are the only reason this relationship has been going on for as long as it has been. Try the no contact rule. Do not initiate contact with said person for three days. If at the end of three days there is no contact on the other end, you know that the relationship is one-sided and why would you want that anyway?
5. No commitment
Finally the biggest indicator that this person is not for you is that they have given you know commitment. When someone wants to be with someone, they do not want to take the risk of losing you to another person. If after six months they still do not want to officially take you off the market, it’s probably because they want to stay on it.